I am Tam.
Tam, I am.
I like green eggs and ham.

 

splders:

 yeah this phone is great and all… but can it fit into my pocket

iamwizz:

iamwizz:

iamwizz:

*my wedding vows*
I promise to eat it twice a day & to keep them thirsty hoes away

might not always open the door for you but I’ll always smack that ass when you walk through

I’ll eat ya booty too because a real nigga please they bitch

jaclcfrost:

i can’t even appreciate the beauty of the sunrise after staying up all night because it’s just like. fuck. there it is. there’s the sun. i fucked up. why am i laughing. nothing is funny. the sun is there and it’s harshly reprimanding me for being awake all night. “this is the life you’ve chosen for yourself fucker” it says. i’m not laughing. i’m crying. there’s the fucking sun

(Source: jaclcfrost)

My only regret is that
I didn’t tell enough people
to fuck off.

My 92 year old grandma. (via coffeestainedheart)

(Source: lule-bell)

crazyeasy:

Finally a sunscreen for me. A manly man. A real man’s man. Thank god a sunscreen I can finally use. I have been getting sunburnt my whole life waiting for this. Can’t use the other feminized sunscreens. Can’t risk losing my man card. Finally. Sunscreen in a black bottle. FOR MEN.

crazyeasy:

Finally a sunscreen for me. A manly man. A real man’s man. Thank god a sunscreen I can finally use. I have been getting sunburnt my whole life waiting for this. Can’t use the other feminized sunscreens. Can’t risk losing my man card. Finally. Sunscreen in a black bottle. FOR MEN.